Political Controversies: Barack Obama Smokes Crack Cocaine… .

Is Barack Obama really a Crackhead who has a Gay Lover…?

Breaking Story…For the past few weeks I have been bombarded with several questions by a certain class of my coworkers here in Easton, PA. During this unwarranted line of questioning I encountered a barrage of evidence that was very questionable to me. One of my coworkers even had the audacity to ask me “If Obama doesn’t do drugs then why, just why does he hang out with this man? “Showing me the picture I quickly identified the man as the infamous Tyrone Biggums whom I must admit likes to smoke crack cocaine. You tell me am I wrong for keeping quiet?

 Next, another coworker, a female of the Caucasian Persuasion jumped up and slapped me in the face during our heated debate during lunch. Shouting like a maniac she screamed, “Listen Dion yo ass need to wake up. Obama is a Muslim extremist who doesn’t like us and he hates Christians!”

Nevertheless, I remained calm and held my position because as of date Who Am I? The Chronicles of Cain hasn’t quite sold enough for me to quit my day job just yet or I would’ve mopped the floor up with her ass for slapping me and talking bad about my manz Obama like that. However, I did manage to muster up the courage and say, “Well if Obama is what you say he is then show me the proof!” I even smirked when I said it. Afterwards the woman quickly dropped her head and headed out the room rather quickly like a dog with it’s tail between it’s legs.

I smiled afterwards, cheesin’ harder than my last name saying, “All of you blank (I did say a racial slur but it’s not called here so I won’t repeat it. There’s no need to spread hatred.) can suck a…!”

But long and behold before I could utter the last word the woman came back into the dining area. She approached me like a pit bull. Standing directly in front of me just mere inches from my face she punched me in my chest with a thunderous blow that almost knocked me off my feet. then she slammed her hand upon the large bench and said, “Look you naive bastard you tell me what this is then?”

Startled by the whole scene and especially the loud sound of her hand hitting the bench I looked down and saw this picture.

“How was I to know?” I asked. “I don’t watch Fox News.”

“Well this didn’t come from Fox I got this from my dear old friend Rush Limbaugh the Republican Man-God.” she spat.

Shortly thereafter, I was caught off guard once again as a fledgling approached me with yet another picture which he emphatically claimed was retrieved from a photo album during a picnic at George W’s house.  He lightly poked me in the chest but when I slapped away his hand he became hostile. vehemently he shouted, “Look here you son-of-a-bitch! I’m trying to save your ass!”Afterwards , he produced a picture of my manz wearing what I believed was dried up milk. 

Again I was corrected by the female who said, “No Dion you are wrong, wrong, wrong! That’s not a milk mustache and you know it! You want us to read your book but you can’t even identify what cocaine looks like. You’re a fool!”

I just looked at them and denied everything as I said, “I know that even the Enquirer must have been asking these harrowing questions for years. Who would have ever guess that America would have elected a black, cocaine addicted mulatto for President of The United States of America over our beloved Mitt Romney?”

Anyway, during my ardent search for truth I have found what I believe to be an eye opening experience. I’ve always been  told that their were two sides to every story. There’s our side and then there’s the truth. Therefore, have you ever wondered why the Republicans fear President Barack Obama? Are their fears unfounded? Does Obama do drugs in secrecy? Does Michelle have enough bootay to satisfy his animalistic cravings, or does he like as the gay prisoners would say some peanut butter on his dipstick? Does Obama believe that he is the Omnificent? Is he really the White man’s devil? And last but not least, why in the hell is Joe Biden wearing Braids? Find out in this tell-all video… and please,let me know what you really think?